I feel so dumb these days. Since I saw my NMAT score, I've always felt so dumb. I know I could've done better, way way way better than what I got. But then again, regrets always come last and now I might just have to live with the fact that I might not get into the med school I want :(

I hate myself for being so lenient, for not managing my time well, and of course, for not trying hard enough. I know I could've done it, only if I tried harder.I could give so many excuses on why I got a low score but still, the fact remains that I failed. Those excuses are just for me to make me feel better about myself.

Everything that's happened made me look back to my whole college life. Before I entered college, I told myself that I would study hard. Tama na yung sobrang tamad ako nung high school. But things remained unchanged, I have always settled for mediocracy. I tried avoiding the spotlight to save myself from the pressure and responsibility that comes with it. If only I was brave enough to try harder, I could've been happier right now.

I know I can't live on regrets forever. What I can do right now is to try harder, prove myself more. And maybe someday, I can be happy about my life again.